Please read this · It concerns a friend
Marno is an
alcoholic.
We have tried talking to him. We have tried hiding the bottle opener. What follows is a reconstruction of what happened to the robot on his corner.
01 / The robot
It was green.
Then orange.
Then red.
The robot did everything correctly and in the right order. It had one job. It had done that job on that corner for eleven years without a single complaint from anybody.
02 / The approach
Marno saw
all three.
Not in that order. Not at the same time as everyone else on the road. But he maintains, to this day, that he definitely saw all three of them.
03 / The impact
The robot did
not survive.
Neither did the bumper, the left indicator, the wheel trim, or Marno’s position that he had only had two.
This is an intervention
Give Brenton
the keys.
He is a wonderful man, a good friend, and a menace to municipal infrastructure after nine o’clock. Sign below. We are keeping a list.
- Accused
- Marno
- Victim
- One (1) municipal robot, aged 11
- Damages
- R14 800, one bumper, one friendship
- Sentence
- He is taking an Uber. Forever.
The name, the numbers and every joke on this page are plain text in this file — type over them and it is somebody else’s problem.
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